You Can Fail At What You Don't Like.

Nobody made this point precisely clear when I got to L.A. in 1997.

Nobody said, "Scott, if you try to play it safe and avoid what's really driving you, you can completely and utterly fail at it, and you will have to start over again anyways. Except you will be 45."

The good news is that if someone HAD said that to me, I probably would have been too dumb to listen or understand and proceeded on the same course anyway.

The fact is: I moved to L.A. in 1997 to be an actor. But only a couple of people knew that. I didn't dare tell most people because then I would actually have to DO IT, and I was terrified of acting, of putting myself out there, naked, to be judged. But, man, did I admire people who did it. That really takes balls. It's an odd admixture of qualities to be a male who's sensitive, daring, artistic, manly, feminine, crying a little on the inside, and yet...every time a casting director says, "NEXT!" or "WOW, that was REALLLLLY BAD...NEXT!" They dust themselves off, look in the mirror each morning and say, "You can do this man! There is no evidence of this right now, but you can do it."

That, my friend, is a no joke level of difficulty.

The thing is you have to suck a little bit before you become great. And sometimes you have to suck a lot. And in the case of acting this can be public. It can be humiliating. This is the part that some people -- myself included -- find distasteful. As an old friend said to me yesterday, "Everybody wants to be the hero, but nobody wants to slay the dragon."

In my case, I spent many years in broadcast television machine rooms at three in the morning and edit bays getting as far away from any kind of stage as I possibly could. I didn't know WHY I was doing that at the time, but I do now. And after many years of this, and excellent mentors, I became a colorist (the guy who fixes all the colors and makes things look more beautiful) in Hollywood. I finally had a cool job that paid well. And I had respect. I thought that was all I ever wanted because I had forgotten about the other thing.

But something strange happened over the years when I honed this craft of coloring TV shows. 

I realized that no matter how hard I tried or studied, everyone that did my job was always at least twice as good as me. At first it didn't bother me. I just applied myself harder. I worked 80 or 90 hour weeks routinely. But still, many of the technical concepts of the job...I just couldn't quite comprehend or retain.

You see, there are two aspects to being a colorist for reality television shows. One aspect is having a good eye for color and what they call the "matching" of scenes. Two person scenes often have 4 main camera angles. The super wide shot which establishes where they are. The individual close-ups of the faces. And the faces talking to each other in the same shot -- sometimes called a "2-shot." And if these master shots don't all match in terms of hue and brightness it won't matter how well the individual shots are colored because the matching is the most important aspect of being a colorist -- at least -- as far as reality television is concerned.

The other aspect of being a colorist is extremely technical. Example: "Hey Scott! We'd like these 1080i HDCam Master Air Tapes to be 720p copied stat! They have to air in 5 hours!" And...my mind would go blank. How do I do that again?

Cut to me calling my colleague Alex (or my assistant). Now, I'm a pretty smart guy. But every guy that did my job was near-genius level or an ACTUAL genius. That's not me. I can make people laugh and smile. I'm entertaining. I'm a good conversationalist about a wide variety of topics. I can make anyone, in any situation, INSTANTLY feel more comfortable than they did the moment before -- on camera or off. I can get people to say things they wouldn't tell anyone -- not even their best friend. I can bounce a soccer ball on my knee continuously for about 5 minutes. But it does appear that I'm not a genius. So I'd call Alex (or my assistant) in the next room. ACTUAL geniuses. 

"Hey, Alex, how do I do the 720p master tape thing again? Do I have to press the thingy and then send house reference signal to the other thingy, and then push the do-hicky?"

Alex: "Hold on. I'm coming over."

And this is how it went.

Every single year.

For 7 years.

But nobody really cared or noticed that much because I was good at the other thing -- coloring. It sucks to be miserably bad at half of your job. For your entire career. For some reason, I had a block with the technical side of the business. I just didn't get it. And what's more: I started to not give a shit about it because it was so frustrating to me.

And then a third thing happened:

I started to really dislike it. The job, that is. I started to dislike being disengaged from people -- the isolation of it. The reason for this is because my whole career started out as a safety measure to protect me from the most terrifying thing I could possibly imagine. Much more terrifying than death.

My dream of being a performer.

When I moved out to L.A. in 1997 I thought that meant being an actor which I have tried a few times. I starred in a play once. A full-length play. I nearly threw up on opening night from the pressure. And in fits and starts this would happen every now and again...the performance thing and then I would quit.

Now, as it turns out, acting was not the thing for me...PRESENTING things is more my style, but I would have arrived at that conclusion a hell of lot sooner if I'd just done the thing I was terrified of.

I wrote this because of the eclipse today.

The eclipse made me do it.

What I'm trying to say is:

You could fail, very badly, at what you don't want. (and I definitely didn't fail badly -- but I did fail).

You might as well do what terrifies you, or what you love, or what sends those little lightning bolts down your spine...or whatever you want to call it.

Do it now. Before it's too late.

Love and Luck,

Scott in Washington, D.C.

The guitarist for The Smashing Pumpkins told me this story...

20 years ago, I walked into a diner on the Sunset Strip in Los Angeles. It was a crisp, autumn evening with neon lights running the length of the boulevard. If L.A. had ever cared about seasons, the sidewalks would have been strewn with freshly fallen leaves. But Hollywood is not a real place, so everything was 'just so', palm trees standing tall, reaching into a cerulean blue field of endorphins. At night, Sunset Boulevard transformed into a time-lapse parade of perfect smiles on former prom kings and queens with aspirations of fame, fortune, and a lifetime of cinematic orgasms. 

This part of the strip presided over a clutch of nightclubs where legends honed their craft in an endless search for that perfect chord. So it was only fitting that I should walk into this particular diner -- Mel's Diner -- with James Iha, the guitarist for The Smashing Pumpkins. I relished the stir that this caused upon our entrance. As the hostess showed us to our table, all of the attention was on James, but I basked and beamed in the reflected light of a bonafide rock star. I wasn't a hanger-on, exactly, because I don't think James had those kinds of relationships. He was a genuine dude. A deep thinker. But I did have that -- less than admirable -- new-to-Hollywood pride at having a famous friend. The feeling of validation. The feeling of being somebody. Fame is infectious. And even good people turn into pricks in Hollywood when this sort of thing occurs. La La Land is a machine with bastardized and monstrous gears in perpetual motion, and if you come out of Hollywood the same person you entered into it, you can count yourself lucky. Very lucky.

We sat down at our table with all kinds of eyes on us. I pretended not to notice. I asked James something I had been pondering for the several weeks we had been galavanting around town.

"How did you end up becoming such a great guitarist?" I asked him.

James put down his menu and thought for a moment before he answered.

"When I was in high school, I had a friend named Javier that played the guitar. Javier was gifted beyond belief. People would go nuts while he played in the halls between classes. It was almost as if he were the instrument -- not the guitar -- and God was playing him. I watched him intensely. I studied his finger positions as they moved from chord to chord effortlessly. I tried to crack the code that was his essence. He knew many songs by rote and played them flawlessly, and with such style. Even the most technically difficult pieces eminated from his guitar strings without strain or sweat. It motivated me. I practiced every night for hours. For a while, my fingers were in terrible shape, but I was driven to match his prowess. I kept at it. Hundreds of hours turned into thousands. One night, a magical thought appeared in my brain. I realized I would never, technically, be as good as Javier. Even if I practiced ten hours a day, for the next ten years, it would never happen. And it occurred to me that I didn't even want to be the best guitar player in the world. I wanted to write the catchiest riffs. Not only did I realize this was my true desire, I also realized that I was capable of it. So I concentrated on creating melody and riffs. I shifted focus. And that's it...that's the answer to your question. And, by the way, our drummer is many times better at his instrument than I am at mine. He has an utterly shocking level of talent."

I stared at James, my mouth agape. Because I loved his story and I loved the way he told it. He really is a thoughtful and lovely person to be around.

Listen to the song "Today" by The Smashing Pumpkins sometime soon. Listen to the first 1.5 seconds of that song and you will understand what James was saying. Almost anyone you know -- literally anyone -- can identify that song in 1.5 seconds beyond a shadow of doubt.

Whatever your dream is in this life, believe in yourself.

Never give up.

Believe in yourself all the way.

With every single mitochondria, every cell of your being.

No one can predict what you are capable of, what you might become. They might spin some good bullshit, but they don't know for sure.

There will be obstacles. Some of them will appear insurmountable. You will fall sometimes. Perhaps you will get hurt. Perhaps your doubts will grow so rapidly during certain periods, you will seriously consider giving up.

But don't.

The world needs more songs like "Today."

And it always will.

Quit?

Today, I was thinking about all the people in my life that never thought I'd make it this far in Peru. Some of them were people close to me -- so it was surprising! My original goal was to be in Peru for 9 months, and, now, I am at eleven months with a job that pays me to travel.

Never let naysayers dissuade you from your dreams or let them fill you with doubts.

Go after your dreams feverishly, for they are yours, and yours alone.

My hero is Anthony Bourdain. He is one of the reasons I went after this path. I don't have a cursory desire to travel the world on a long-term basis, it is in the marrow of my bones.

One day, my best friend (at the time) said to me, "But you are no Anthony Bourdain! He's a best-selling author and a renowned chef!" That really hurt my feelings even though I knew it was true. What I found really funny about that comment is that the person honestly thought I didn't know that Anthony Bourdain is more talented than me. That he was making some kind of revelatory statement about the universe. Almost EVERYONE is less talented than that man at hosting television. If people let that stop them, nobody would attempt to host a TV show! Some would argue that quite a few people on the Travel Channel are less talented than him. Do you think they care? I bet they don't.

I had one person on Facebook -- who doesn't even know me by the way -- go off on a tirade about how ridiculous my dream is. I found that odd. I'd stack my happiness against that guy's happiness any day of the week. I know that person thought they were just helping me avoid a life of foolishness. But they have no idea what's in my heart. What makes me tick. I look at his life and feel no envy whatsoever. But I also don't know him. And that's my point.

Fancy homes don't fill me with envy. American Express Black cards don't fill me with envy. If I were to feel envy at all, which I rarely do, it would be for people who are doing very little that they don't want or have to do.

Four years ago, a friend of mine was trying to hook me up with a job hosting a small show about the many splendors of New York City. It would have required me to walk the streets of Manhattan and interview people on the fly. Realizing that I had no experience in this arena, I immediately did two things. I signed up for an improv comedy class in Los Angeles and I started doing stand up comedy. That was terrifying. One night, the guy that went up on stage after me was a well-known actor. Those are the kind of people you are competing against for jobs. They've already made it. All the way. And they are still honing their craft every night! I don't find that daunting. I find it inspiring.

Shortly after that, I signed up with a reputable commercial talent agency in Los Angeles. I auditioned in those stark, white rooms day after day and began the process of deconstructing the bare-bones two-minute performance necessary to obtain TV commercial work. I ended up on set in a KFC commercial with famed music director Joseph Kahn after two months without so much as a call back. It's certainly not the height of achievement in performance, but I did it! And I was proud.

The haters are real. Don't run. Hone your skills!

You have to prepare. People will heckle you because of the fear and discontent in their life. People will insult you because they had a bad day. Or maybe their life sucks despite the picture they assiduously paint every day. And training can help with this. I always find it funny when these people throw barbs at me as if these were things I hadn't considered. Oh? Is it risky to travel the world with no money and no steady job? Why...I hadn't thought of that! You, sir, are truly brilliant! I shall immediately reconsider everything I have put effort into for the last 5 years because of your insight! Thank you for saving me from my own dreams! That was a close one!

I'm not saying it's impossible to regret decisions you make in your life, even though they are heartfelt. What I'm saying is that the things people truly regret on their deathbed are the things they felt they should have done, but didn't. 

Your 401K might not protect you from losing almost everything you imagined. Your friends and family won't necessarily do that either. Life has no guarantees except death and taxes. The only thing you can do in this life is face your fears about what you must do with courage. It's not about denying fear. Embrace it! Feel the fear and do what you feel you must do anyway.

In fact, a large part of the reason why I embarked on this path is to speak to an audience of people in their 40's (and beyond) that believe it's too late. The people who believe it's too late to follow their dreams that may be way outside of the box. My audience is not 20 year olds. You could go to prison at 20 and still recover. But many people in their 40's feel they must live within the confines of a cookie cutter dream that isn't even theirs. That dream was sold to them.

It is my dream to reach out to older people who feel trapped as I did. It is NEVER too late to pursue your dreams. Never. We might only have one shot at this. And soon, very soon, in terms of civilization, we will all be in the ground. This is not a sad fact. Embrace it! Do everything you want to do and never quit. Oftentimes, the journey is the destination.

Is the love of your life on a bus in Cambodia right now? They might be!

Is the idea that will take hold of your heart and soul in a cafe in Bali? It might be!

If you feel that there is something profoundly wrong with your life, there are many ways to seek help outside of a couch talking about your mother. The gurus! I am moved by them. I seek them out. And I cherish their mission.

Whatever your dream is, don't quit. You have probably thought about it a lot more than the people who will try to fill you with doubts.

Believe in yourself.

I believe in you!

Scott in Peru.

Floating HEARTS around the World.

There are hearts and souls that traverse this Earth in search of transcendent and transformative experiences. It's a calling.

They are my tribe.

I have a connection with these daring souls that runs deep, perhaps over a multitude of lifetimes. There is an idea that this tribe is composed of dreamy, fairy-like people that throw caution to the wind and let fate carry them on gossamer wings, come what may. 

In my travels, I have not met many of these types. The hard-core -- if you will -- world travelers that I've met take precautions. They constantly chop down the odds of negative events at every turn. World travel is not about a constant worry concerning possible dangers therein, but rather, a blissful attitude that is counterbalanced by good, common-sense measures.

Well before I moved to Cusco, Peru, I researched the safest location for a hostel. I was aware that Cusco is a very safe city, but nonetheless I like to frequent bars. I have always loved this 'church' of convivial congregation and storytelling. If you're walking around in an unfamiliar city late at night, with a few beers in you, it is wise to start things off by residing in a safe location. So, I made the trade. I chose to start of my journey in Peru by living in a room with 10 people for 15 U.S. dollars per night. That's very expensive for Peru. It may not be as convenient as having your own place, but it can be a wise trade if you don't know the law of the land. I used my highly-rated hostel as a home base while I searched for lodging close to the center of town. It can also be a great way to meet people -- some floating hearts -- that love to share their discoveries.

For example, it was in this hostel that I learned to be cautious in selecting a cab in La Paz, Bolivia. It is not like Cusco. What you end up learning about La Paz is that taking small buses is not only 20 times cheaper, it is safer. Statistically, nobody is kidnapping a busload of Bolivians. Not that kidnapping is a primary concern in Bolivia, but, again, it is not like Peru.

Rule #1: Understand, as best you can, the transport situation before you enter a new country.

Let's talk about Rule #2 which actually should be Rule #1: Try to form a network beforehand.

We all know that money is valuable. It can get you out of tight and unexpected situations. But you know what's more powerful than money?

People who care about you.

I received a message 3 days ago from my friend in Costa Rica. She wrote, "My very close friend is in Cusco right now, and something has happened that is troubling her. She could use a friend right now. Would you be willing to meet with her?"

Yes.

Say yes to connections.

All the time.

You never know where they might lead. In my case, I am rarely thinking that I might get something out of it. But I always do. 

I met my friend's friend in the center of Cusco, and we took a walk to let Charlie out and play. Charlie is dog I know and love in Cusco. While we were watching Charlie romp around the park, she told me her story and I realized that she was a person I could connect with. I liked her straight away. It came out during the conversation that she was moving to Bali in a month which filled me with surprise and glee. I'm thinking strongly about making a temporary move to Bali in August and she knew a lot about living there. Moreover, I enjoyed her company immensely and I could see us spending time together in Bali.

To further underline my point: uncover information about new countries from people who know what they are talking about. It is important to supplement guide books with information from people who have actually lived there, and not just for a week. There is a night and day difference between people who travel in a place for a week and people who take up residence in a foreign country. While this woman and I talked, she warned me not to rent a scooter in Bali without a license, as many travelers do. If you get pulled over by a policeman, and you're unlucky, you could find yourself in a potentially dangerous situation. Some of the policeman in Bali take this offense very seriously. But if you have the information beforehand, it's an easy altercation to avoid.

The very next day I received a text from my good friend Aarron in Australia. I did ayahuasca -- (the mysterious and often hallucinogenic jungle brew that originated in the Amazon jungle) -- with Aarron in Peru, and we bonded irrevocably through this experience. Aarron wrote me: "My dear loved one fell ill in Cusco and is in the hospital. It would mean a lot to me if you stopped by and said hello...see how she's doing."

Again, hell yes!

I love Aarron so much -- a fellow floating heart -- that I would have taken a bus across Peru to see his loved one if he'd asked me to. Such bonds can form very quickly among travelers. They can form in a fraction of the time that I formed friendships living in the United States.

I took a taxi to the hospital to see Aarron's relative. As I entered, I was surprised at the modern sophistication of the facility. Cusco has some very nice hospitals! A friend of mine had life-threatening surgery here for $1,000.00 U.S. dollars and solved a problem with her spine that had plagued her for 10 years. A top-notch surgeon saved her life. There are things about the U.S. that I hold in very high regard. It has some of the best medical care anywhere in the world. But you'd better have a lot of money or excellent health insurance or that will mean absolutely nothing to your predicament. Every single person I've ever met that has vehemently opposed ObamaCare has NEVER wondered if they'd be covered in the event of a medical emergency. Think about how unusual that is for most of the world. I'm not saying ObamaCare isn't flawed in some ways, just something to think about. And somebody with balls and brains had to get that train started. If you've never been sick and had to make a choice between your life savings or getting the medical attention you need, you may not be in the best position to judge such matters.

Anyway, I digress...

I entered this woman's hospital room -- a woman I had never met -- and had such a lovely conversation with her. She was recovering nicely, but had been gravely ill with pneumonia. While we talked, she asked me about my next destination and I told her it was Bali. She lit up like a Christmas tree at the thought of it. She'd been to Bali multiple times and had befriended a gregarious taxi driver who helped her navigate the foreign land. The driver became her good friend and gave her some great tips.

She proceeded to connect me with this person on Facebook. And just like that, not only did I meet a person whose company I enjoyed, but I suddenly obtained trustworthy transport in Bali. Again, transport is extremely important in foreign countries. Sometimes, you feel vulnerable in taxis. There doesn't seem to be cause for concern regarding taxis in Bali, but it's very comforting to have an ally in this arena whenever possible.

So now I had 2 extra people, within 3 days, that I could connect with in Bali. This is in addition to the two adventurous woman I had met in Machu Picchu, three years ago, that I will see when I get there. Things were starting to roll along quite nicely.

Rule #1: Get the lowdown on the transport. Once you are in a stranger's car in a strange land, you are in a vulnerable position.

Rule #2: Try to form a network beforehand.

Rule #3: Have a way to access your money besides your debit and credit cards. 

I like PayPal as a backup. If you get into a pickle with your bank cards you can always PayPal someone in exchange for them withdrawing money for you. Also, you can sometimes find work as a writer and be paid that way. Another backup is having a Charles Schwab account. I really regret not doing this before I moved to Peru. You can save a ton of money in ATM fees having this card. I highly recommend it for long-term travel. I have spent hundreds of dollars taking my money out in Peru. It's so wasteful.

In conclusion, the people that I've met in Peru, have been the most wonderful, awe-inspiring surprise about the magic here. It always comes down to the people. No Machu Picchu, Eiffel Tower, or soft sand beach can ever match the people that compose this tribe. The floating hearts will restore your faith in humanity, should it ever be temporarily lost. If you ever get into the mindset that everyone is out for themselves, travel will dispel this notion quickly.

The digital nomads, the wanderlusters, the floating hearts...they are my tribe. They are my family.

And I am filled with gratitude to be one of them.

PLAN B!

I was in my 250-square foot apartment, staring at the sun rising over the majestic Andes mountains, when my phone rang.

I’ve been in Peru for over 10 months. It’s been one of the most electrifying, educational time periods of my entire life. In two more months, it appears that I will be flying back to Washington D.C. to stay with my parents for 3-4 weeks. During that time, I will be planning the logistics of my next destination.

Bali is currently my top choice. Land of many gurus…and possibly…romance! I smiled at the thought so often associated with the movie “Eat Pray Love.” After all, it wasn’t the main reason I was considering Bali as a destination. But it was fun to think about!

My Dad started off the phone call…

“Look, Scott, we know that you’re on this world travel kick and you want to be on television talking about travel and spirituality, but have you considered a ‘Plan B’ if this doesn’t all work out?”

I paused for a few seconds to consider his question.

“Honestly, no, I’ve never thought about a Plan B. That’s because there is no Plan B,” I said flatly.

“It’s great to have dreams, Scott. But we all have to live in the real world. What are you going to do if you run out of money?”

“Make more money, I guess. Listen, Dad, I’ve been pretty sick in Peru 5 or 6 times. I’ve had parasites in my stomach. I had $200 remaining in my account when I got my current travel video job. Does that sound like a ‘Plan B’ kind of guy to you? Did I fly home when all that super difficult stuff happened? Nope. I’m still here. I think you should prepare yourself for the strong possibility that I might be flying out of D.C. soon after I get there. And it won’t be for a weekend at the Hilton in Paris. It will be something a bit more rigorous.”

“I see,” my Dad said thoughtfully.

“I know you guys are just looking out for me. I get that. But travel is not my hobby. It’s my life.”

“Alright. Well you know we support you no matter what. It will be nice to see you.”

“Same here, Dad. I’m looking forward to spending time with you guys. And, also, oxygen, at zero feet elevation.”

We hung up the phone.

Now, I’m not saying it’s a terrible idea to have a Plan B. I sometimes admire people that have a Plan B. I’m just not that guy. I’m not sensible in the usual definition of the word. I apply logic to most situations, I have a reason for everything I do, and a strategy, but I’m not ‘sensible’, exactly.

I’ve spent nearly my whole life not really believing in anything except making good money, fine dining and craft cocktails, having a good work ethic, and appreciating my wonderful colleagues of which there have been many.

But I never believed in anything.

That feeling didn’t happen to me until I started broadcasting on Periscope (Twitter’s Live Platform) about a year ago. That’s when I felt something. I felt it in my balls. It felt like me.

45 years is a damned long time to wait for that kind of feeling.

You think I’m gonna let go of that feeling now? After waiting longer than some people live? My biological father died at 33! You gotta be outta your mind!

My parents won’t see the validity of my purpose until real money starts coming in, and that’s fine. I don’t blame them. That’s just how they’re wired. In some ways, that’s a legitimate way of thinking. Hell, even I used to feel important when I’d get that envelope on Fridays with all that money in it, and I’m a very different person than my parents. Money can’t truly make you feel important. You’re already important. That’s just something we are all born with.

Somebody asked me, recently, how much money it would take for me to go back to my old job, being in an office for almost the entire day.

I thought about it for a minute.

“1 million dollars per year,” I answered, because after one year I would probably never have to think about having a job I didn’t want. Then I paused, reflected again, and I changed my answer.

“I wouldn’t go back for any sum of money that exists.”

Not because it’s a horrible job. It’s a fantastic job! I just don’t want to do it anymore.

And this is the important part: because time is far more valuable than money. And a year is a lot of time. If I only live to be 80, I would have spent more than 1% of my entire life in Peru. And I’m quite happy with that trade.

But I thought about it from my parents point of view. What if, God forbid, something happened to me and they had to deal with it? It would make their life a living hell. But I can’t think that way. Not now. Not ever. I can’t let those kinds of demons keep me from living the life that I envision. That’s the kind of Plan (B)ullshit that kept me doing a job that didn’t speak to me for years and years.

But I’m grateful for that job because it got me into TV. I’ve loved TV since I was a little kid watching “The Brady Bunch.” TV has always fascinated me. Thrilled me. And now TV is better than ever. I dare someone to watch the first episode of “Heroes” and not watch the second one right away. That, my friends, is some good storytelling.

Or “Lost.” Remember the pilot episode of “Lost”? How totally engrossing it was? At the time, it was the most expensive pilot ever made and boy did they spend that money wisely!

You know what I say to Plan B?

I say F that s***!

You know what one of my favorite places in the world is?

Airports.

Unknown wonders lie just outside those gates. Things you never imagined possible. The people I’m searching for around the world are living and breathing just outside those gates. The gurus! Men and woman with ancient knowledge that can be used to improve the quality of our lives. People who see beyond ordinary life…beyond the world as we typically understand it. Psychics, shaman, reiki masters, plant medicine experts.

Those people excite me. The thought of meeting them drives me.

I’m going to find them.

That is Plan A.

Where “A” stands for “ALL IN.”

 Every. Single. Chip.

Why I am Still Living in Cusco, Peru.

I'm going to tell the story of why I am still in Cusco, Peru.

I lived in Los Angeles, California for almost 20 years. I was a television colorist. It was my job to make reality television shows more beautiful by adjusting all the colors. It's a very good job. It pays extremely well. 

But I had this feeling that I was meant to do something else.

I drove expensive cars and I lived in a somewhat fancy loft apartment in downtown L.A. on the border of skid row. Many of my friends lived a life of luxury in these apartments while people were homeless and suffering just two blocks away from where we all drank our beers every night, living like kings. Most of us were born into a very privileged class where the entire world just looked like one big opportunity. We all had excellent educations and parents who cared deeply about our future. The deck of cards was stacked in our favor from the beginning.

I felt guilty about my unhappiness. I should have been happy. But I was hiding from my destiny which was to explore the world and search for knowledge that was well outside the confines of my education.

There are many people in this world with almost nothing but the clothes on their back. And all they want to do is help people with knowledge that has been handed down to them for generations. Knowledge about how to be a good person in the world. To not feel envy. To feel mostly content with whatever they have. To nearly eliminate desire.

So i decided to use my resources to seek out the best psychics and healers in Los Angeles. It started with Krishanti. She gave me the confidence to follow my dreams. Shortly after, one of my closest friends in the world, Marisa Sommerville, introduced me to Periscope which is a live broadcasting platform owned by Twitter. As soon as I started using Periscope (I'm @seekthegurus - Periscope link at the top of this blog) I realized I was going to move to Peru and show people the beauty of Peru. 

Then, my good friend Maria Riley of University of Southern California (USC) repeatedly told me, "You can do this! You are meant to show people awe inspiring things around the world!"

That was the final straw.

I sold everything and brought little more than $10,000 U.S. dollars (my life savings), a laptop and a cell phone to Cusco, Peru, my new home.

I spent the first three months in Cusco dining on expensive food and drinking a large amount of alcohol with my good friends here. I was escaping but also healing. I had spent many years in Los Angeles hiding from what I really wanted to do with my life. I want to make it clear that I am extremely grateful to my friends in the television industry for providing me with a good life while I was trying to find my way. Most of the people I worked with were incredibly talented. I was, in fact, astounded at the level of talent and dedication in the reality television industry. It is unbelievable how much talent goes into making shows that some people consider trivial. There is a reason that it has become a huge part of American culture. And that reason is that these people are great story tellers. When it comes down to it, life is all about good stories.

I spent 8 months in Peru trying to figure out how to make a living by telling stories.

I ran out of money at 8 months. I gave myself one more week before I was going to buy a plane ticket back to Virginia to live with my parents in utter defeat. This was a result I had prepared myself for mentally when I first decided to fly to Peru. It is pretty dire for some Americans to live with their parents at 45 years old without a single penny to their name. But I was prepared to meet that fate. Plus, I missed my parents anyways. Even though my parents didn't believe in my dream to be a television broadcaster, they still supported me in their own way. 

I couldn't blame them. Who starts a career as a television presenter when they're in their 40's? It's pretty much like dreaming of walking a wire between the twin towers in New York City!

So with one week left in Peru, I received a call from a very talented television producer in Los Angeles named Rhett Smith.

He said he would pay me to make travel videos about my purpose.

He understood that my purpose was to travel the world and find the gurus. People whose purpose was to help others with ancient and esoteric knowledge.

And just like that, my dream came true.

In a way it doesn't matter if I end up on the Travel Channel or Bravo or any of those networks.

I had a dream to expose an audience to what is possible in this world, and that's what matters to me.

The idea that if people need help, and they feel stuck in their life -- if they are deeply unsatisfied and don't know what to do -- that there are ways to seek out help that are way outside the box. 

There are people in this world that see far beyond the third dimension that we normally exist in. People who have made it their life mission to help others. That's a serious calling. The highest calling.

If it weren't for Marisa and Maria and Rhett and Krishanti and my shaman in Peru, Juanma, and numerous others I would be lost. I would still be after bigger apartments and fancier cars.

But here I am in my 250 square foot apartment in the Andes mountains of Cusco, Peru, continually searching for a way to expose teachers that are of the highest caliber. The Gurus!

It has been hard. 

I've had food poisoning five times. I've had the flu for weeks at a time. I've had parasites that make you run for the bathroom every day. When I took the bus, I couldn't eat any food for fear that I would have some horrible 'accident' in the middle of nowhere.

And I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I had a girlfriend, here in Peru, named Luciana. Her search for ancient wisdom led her to enlist the help of a shaman and hike very high into the Andes mountains to have a ceremony. High enough to make you sick to your stomach. She decided to dedicate that ceremony to me, completely selfless, so that I could continue my journey. She said the shaman agreed to dedicate the ceremony to me and screamed into the mountains of Cusco that someone should help me. Directly afterwords, a huge gust of wind blew all of the items off the blanket dedicated to the ceremony in what she described as a very odd moment. 

A few days later I got a call from Rhett, the television producer in Los Angeles, that the company would pay me to make very short travel videos about spiritually and the beauty of world travel.

Peru is marketed as a place of magic. Ayahuasca ceremonies in the jungle. Plant medicine. The knowledge of the Quechua people living very high in the Andes mountains.

But Peru is a place of actual magic. It is one of the most magical, bewildering places on Earth.

If you come here for a period of time you will see things you would not believe. Things that are utterly stupefying. 

My message is this:

Life is short.

Whatever your dream is in this life, believe in yourself. Your life will expand in proportion to your willingness to leave your comfort zone.

I wish you all the happiness and love in the world.

Believe in yourself.

Love and luck!

Scott in Peru.

Help! I'm drowning!

I had 2 remote healing sessions in the past 24 hours.

I've been attempting to work on myself -- to grow into a better person -- for some time now.

It's part of why I came to Peru.

Remember that if you are stuck in your life, there are people in this world with knowledge way, way beyond what most people have seen.

I am collecting some of those people to refer them to you at a later time.

The person I met with today -- I believe is internationally renown -- but that doesn't matter to me.

He offered me 4 more sessions, (free), which was rather nice of him.

Remember that if you need help, lying on a couch and talking about your childhood is only one, of many, many ways to heal.

We all have a bunch of crap floating around inside us, deterring us from being the best version of ourselves.

I might be mentioning the two people that found and helped me in the last 24 hours at some point in the near future.

In the meantime, I have a list of spiritual teachers a few posts down in this blog.

Love and Luck,

Scott in Peru.

Avoiding Problems with People.

This is a picture of our personal bodyguard in Egypt. He was the nicest, friendliest person you could ever meet. He can also break your spine without much effort while being attacked by two other armed men simultaneously.

This year I have given a lot of thought to the what I call the 3 People Principle.

If I wrote a "book" entitled, Everything You Need to Know About Life, and that book only contained one page of information it would be:

Make sure the 3 people you spend the most time with are high-caliber people of great integrity who have their shit together and do what they say they are going to do.

This one rule will probably make your entire life go smoothly.

But how do you FIND these people?

Here's how:

Pay very, very, very close attention to what people DO and almost no attention to what they say. People will NOT tell us who they are by their words. But their actions will tell us everything.

Oftentimes, when I've been confused about a person it is because I would like to believe their words or what they are trying to portray with their words. I want to believe them because there is something charismatic about them.

I no longer fall for this.

Love and Luck,

Scott in Peru.

Guru #6: My AYAHUASCA shaman in Cusco, Peru - JUANMA

I came to Peru for the first time 2.5 years ago for 30 days.

My primary goal was to do ayahuasca. However, my most important criteria for that event was that I meet a truly great shaman in an organic way. That meant: no TripAdvisor, no internet. By day 25 of the trip, I was getting discouraged. But on day 26 I met Juanma, and I knew I was meant to do ayahuasca in Cusco, Peru with him as my guide.

As much as that experience changed my life, I was shocked to find myself back in Juanma's apartment 2.5 years later doing another ayahuasca ceremony with him. He also become my good friend.

There are many "shamans" in the Sacred Valley of Peru that charge $150 U.S. dollars a night or even much more. That is really exorbitant for Peru. I would almost say it's outrageous. There's a large part of me that feels you shouldn't see people like this no matter how "great" they are as "shaman." But I could be wrong. It's just how I personally feel.

Juanma charges much less than this and puts 150% of his soul into the ceremonies. And, man oh man, I did change. Both times.

He has had a huge and positive impact on my life and I am grateful.

If you come to Peru and would like to do a ceremony with him, he might be in Cusco, or he might be in his other home in the jungle. Most people would prefer to do a ceremony in the jungle where ayahuasca was born. I can't blame folks for that logic at all. However, it should be stated that it doesn't matter where you do ayahuasca. It's the WHO that really matters. That being said I would still like to do ayahuasca in the jungle at some point in my life.

Love and Luck from Peru,

Scott

Guru #4 (Los Angeles): Mary Elizabeth Holmes, CCH

Hi guys and gals! Here's Guru #4...

Introducing: Mary Elizabeth Holmes, CCH, Certified Clinical HYPNOTHERAPY, COACHING, ENERGY MANAGEMENT.

As part of my lengthy session with Mary, she produced a 30 minute recording that I listened to over 100 times in my Downtown L.A. loft...that place seems FAR AWAY NOW!

She has a 5/5 stars on Yelp for a reason.

Want to work on some deep-seated issues? Give her a call.

Possibly the Most Influential Psychic / Healer I Have Ever Met. Krishanti.

Guru #3: Psychic / Healer in Los Angeles, California:

Krishanti

My thinking really started to change after only one session with Krishanti. I'm forever grateful.

She does psychic readings and hands-on healing. She can do BOTH in one session if you like.

In a way, my journey to quit my cubicle job with almost no money, and travel the world in search of ancient knowledge, started with Krishanti.

Love and Luck to you always Kristanti!

Your friend Scott in Peru.

Guru #2 in Los Angeles, California: Kris Cahill, PSYCHIC!

Guru #2 : Kris Cahill. Los Angeles, California.

One of the approximately 30 gurus I met with to find my life's path before leaving L.A. after 20 years.

Kris is a psychic with a gift. Very few psychics are the real deal. She is one of them.

If you want answers to deep questions, check her out.

If it weren't for people like Kris, I would still be doing a job that was killing me slowly.

Love and Luck,

Scott in Peru

Guru #1 in Arizona. Machelle Glassburn.

I saw about 10 main 'gurus' or experts, if you prefer, before I left Los Angeles, California. There were probably 20 or 30 total. I'm going to introduce a few of them over the next week.

Machelle Glassburn, in Arizona, was one of them, who owns:

http://bit.ly/2n1tKkw

I went to her for hypnotherapy to find my life's path. At that time I didn't know I would move to Peru.

Thanks, Machelle!!

What Happened to Me When I Drank AYAHUASCA in Peru??

My Birthday offering:

WHAT happened to me after I drank AYAHUASCA?

Ayahuasca is the ancient, medicinal jungle brew imbibed in the Amazon jungle for thousands of years.

What happens when you come to Peru, participate in a ceremony, and DRINK IT?

CAUTION: Please be careful who you choose as your shaman! Ayahuasca can be very dangerous when prepared or administered by those who are misinformed or have bad intentions.

Love and Luck,

Scott in Peru.

What I Learned this Year.

1.     Trying is the hardest part. Once you uncover the goal that is deeply entrenched in your heart, going after it is terrifying. You’ll do anything to hide from it. Booze, dating, binge TV watching, anything. But trying every day, even when it goes poorly, is the recipe for success.

2.     The 3 people you spend the most time with will MAKE OR BREAK your life.

3.     There is pure, unmitigated magic in following your dreams. And it happens quickly.

4.     Long-term travel is harder than people make it look on Facebook.

5.     The material amount of things I require to be happy is almost non-existent.

6.     If you f*** up, say you’re sorry and mean it.

7.     $10,000 goes very, very far in certain parts of the world.

8.     Track your progress with a chart or checklist. That which gets measured gets managed. Progress is next to impossible without rigorous tracking.

9.     Traveling in third world countries? Bring activated charcoal pills. They will save your life.

10.  Hanging around people that don’t believe in you and your dreams is extremely dangerous. You might end up believing their doubts more than you believe in yourself.

11.  Time is a non-renewable resource. Money is totally renewable. At any time.

12.  Being shy is often a losing move. Talk to the person next to you.

13.  Spend money on high-quality food.

14.  Travel and meeting new people is the beating pulse of my entire soul. And knowledge from great mystics. These two things combined will drive the rest of my life. I was born for this. I am filled with gratitude that it’s happening. Completely filled with gratitude.

Are you happy??

2 people asked me recently if I was happy with my 'new' life which I thought was nice of them.

I said it's not necessarily about being 'happy.'

When you are on your path, you can feel it and the world is a more magical place. Magical things start happening all the time.

It also elevates the state of the entire world when you follow your dreams. I truly believe that. The world needs more of that.

Don't ever forget that the world is SUPPOSED to be filled with magic. You are SUPPOSED to look forward to another day on this Earth.

If you don't feel that way, please change something.

Today.

Failure.

I was 'wasting' a veritable ton of time in Cusco, Peru, my new home. More time than some people I know waste in two years. 

Whole weeks went by with nothing accomplished. This didn't bother me, initially. Until several weeks turned into three months. The first few months were fine -- just going out and having a good time every night. I needed it. My entire soul was tired. I had done a job for many years that only had two benefits:

1. Money.

2. The wonderful people I worked with.

However, there was no soul-level satisfaction in my work. Zero. It was a grind, as they say. So I sold everything I owned, packed one suitcase, and unwound -- 11,200 feet in the Andes mountains. For a very, very long time.

It's a key component of health, in my opinion, to 'waste' a lot of time hanging out with good friends and doing 'nothing.' I'm keenly aware of how exorbitant a luxury this is. I have seen some astonishing poverty in my life. Most of my travels have been in developing countries, not Bora Bora.

But there comes a time when you want to be productive, whatever that might mean to you.

I realized that in order to be productive, most of us have to measure results, or our goals won't happen. The picture attached to this post is my checklist for 18 different items I set out to accomplish on a daily basis. Big wins are composed of smaller daily wins that accumulate over chunks of time.

"That which gets measured, gets managed," is a quote often attributed to the great business management writer (guru!) Peter Drucker <-- (click for Peter's 10 quotes to live by)!

I think it's a powerful axiom, indeed. There are a lot of "O"s on my chart...a lot of 'failures,' if you will. But there are also quite a few "X"s. At the end of a month and a half I can see how I did on my goals.

There is nowhere to hide with this method of tracking. Your mind can't obfuscate the issue of progress with the little lies we often tell ourselves about what we do. The Xs and Os are right there in plain sight telling you how you did. We are what we do every day. Not what we say we are going to do. Not our intentions. But what we actually do every day. Often, in relationships, we get caught up in what people say and not what they do. We want to believe what they say because they have very attractive characteristics. But the proof of character is in what we do on a day-to-day basis.

I share this in the hopes that some people will find it useful. I loved the idea of turning wins and losses into a concrete graphic, in-your-face feedback loop.

Good luck out there!

Scott in Peru.

Los Angeles: Want Guidance from a Great Psychic?

There are two psychics that had a tremendously positive effect on my life, which is now about 180 degrees from what it was a year ago. They have 'the gift' (which is very rare - I've seen a lot of psychics including one of Bono's and the owner of Ralph's grocery stores' psychic).  

Of all the psychics I've seen in my life, these two enlightened me the most.

One caveat:  they are based in Los Angeles.

Try them out!

1.  Krishanti -- (who also does energetic healing) -- I used to do my sessions with her as half psychic reading, half energy healing:

2. Farah (no website) 818-906-2624 in Encino, California.

When you call Farah, raise your voice just slightly, and speak very clearly. Her hearing is totally fine when you do a psychic reading with her, but on the phone, her hearing is not quite as good.

Be careful before you see either of these two women!

You might quit your lucrative job and move to Peru to a room with 10 beds which is, you know, going to make you look like you lost all your marbles.

Except you didn't.

Love and Luck from Peru.

Scott

Your Parasite is Going to Kill You. (The End)

“Your parasite is going to kill you,” the shaman said, smiling broadly at me.

“What?”

“A parasite has been living inside your body for a long time. It likes you. It feels cozy in there. And now that parasite is growing so fast that it's going to kill you,” he explained.

“I don’t understand, Juanma,” I answered in disbelief.

My stomach was now feeling uneasy. Unsurprising considering the topic at hand. Also, the way Juanma’s eyes shown in the sunlight coming through the open door of the cafe, was disconcerting. I didn’t notice his eyes as much the last time I’d seen him -- two years ago -- because almost everything took place at night. And in the morning, after the ayahuasca ceremony was finished, my mind was not focused on his facial features.

He resumed.

“You are walking around Cusco, spending all your money, gazing at the churches like a tourist in a dream. But you are not a tourist. You live here. What are you waiting for? Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. Your parasite is also waiting. And it’s growing in strength. In power. Do you know what your parasite is waiting for?” he asked intently. He seemed to relish how I was squirming in my chair.

“No, what?” I asked, irritated. Even in my anxious state, I sensed he was correct about whatever it was he was trying to say. The gist of it was not good.

“Disaster.”

I went silent. I sipped my black coffee and looked around the cafe.

I had met the woman that opened Jack’s cafe, here in the middle of Cusco, Peru. She was Australian, I believe. She’d opened a few different businesses around the world, most of them successful, before settling on Cusco as her final resting place. And when she did settle here, she opened this bustling, expat favorite – quite expensive for this city – on one of its most prominent corners. It's been a raging success ever since.

When I was in town, two years ago, on a mission to do ayahuasca in Peru, I bumped into her at this cafe and I asked if I could interview her on being an expat in a rather odd geographical location, 11,200 feet deep in the Andes mountains. She said, ‘sure.’ But our schedules would not cooperate and 4 months later she was dead at fifty. I only met Jane three times, briefly. But sometimes, when I am sitting in Jack’s quietly, I see her figure running around with purpose and alacrity.

Jane, lucky and smart as she was, had a vice. She was a heavy smoker. This is presumably what ended her life. But I never would have suspected that she was sick back then, seeing her hustling around the cafe, a whirling dervish of multitasking energy. It is almost impossible to believe, in retrospect, that she had been diagnosed with breast cancer long before I had met her. This is what I thought about as I tried to distract myself from Juanma’s words. Perhaps the random ravings of a mad man who bore a striking resemblance to a more fit, (and more Peruvian), John Malkovich.

Juanma continued.

“Your behavior is dangerous, and that’s why you continue to act the way you've been acting, looking at buildings, talking about colorful balconies while you walk around Cusco. You need to wake up. Because if you don’t wake up, your life is going to fall into ruins. Disaster. Don’t wait until your life is a disaster. Start right now. Today. Don’t wait, wait, and wait...and wait. What are you waiting for? Your parasite is smiling while you wait. And when your life is destroyed and you have no money, it will devour you completely. Do you understand what I’m saying to you? WAKE UP! Anything. Do dishes at a restaurant. Anything. It doesn’t matter. Do you understand??”

“Yes, I understand,” I replied weakly. I was shaken. My tight smile turned into a frown and back again. My face couldn’t decide what to do. It’s unnerving when someone describes not only your external behavior, but your internal behavior as if they’ve been watching you every day for years.

But Juanma hadn’t been watching me. How did he know so much about me?

“Scott, you have to understand that you can use Cusco as a retreat. You can use it to your advantage. Cusco has a dark, powerful energy. Tourists don't understand this because they come and go. But expats get destroyed here. I have seen it happen many times. See these people working in the cafe? They live in Cusco. The dark energy will not hurt them because they are not dreaming. They live here, but not in a dream, like your friends. You must use Cusco as a retreat and not go out at night. Drink 4 liters of water per day. Cleanse your energy. Don’t interact with people. Wear sunglasses and earphones when you walk around. Don’t play music in them, but just so people won’t stop you or talk to you. Again, you do not understand this place. It destroys people from outside of here. OK??”

“Yes, I understand,” I repeated as before, my own words sounding robotic when I heard them.

The truth is that I did know exactly what Juanma was talking about. And he wasn’t being histrionic. There were many stories of expats in Cusco, deep in the mountains in the middle of nowhere, losing everything -- more than just their money. They went back home in little pieces of themselves. They were cautionary tales of people just 'living it up.' Sex, alcohol, going out every night.

The snake squeezing the life out of them, slowly. They didn’t realize what was happening until the denouement.

Juanma was right. I was going to have to wake up and kill my parasite.

(The End. Part 2 of 2)

Your Parasite is going to kill you.

I was lying in bed today sobbing uncontrollably. The Parasite was coming.

Many of my dreams in life had come true. I’d packed one medium-sized black suitcase and headed to Peru with a skip in my step. My intention? To travel the world forever and report on anything supernatural that I encountered.

In Peru, I fell in love with the kind of woman you don’t meet often. Someone of such beauty and intellect, it takes you aback. She understood far too many things about the world for being forty. She’s a well-known and respected healer in Peru. We traveled the length and breadth of the country and Bolivia as well. It was very much like being inside a 70mm technicolor dream.

I spent different currencies in South America that all looked like monopoly money to me. It wasn’t quite connecting in the synapses of my brain that it was ACTUAL money. That didn’t seem to matter much, because there was always plenty of loot remaining in my account.

And now, there isn’t.

I’m a 45 year old man, living in South America, with few marketable skills except that I can write decently. In short, I’m properly fu***d. No 401K savings. No credit. No benevolent grandfather dying to leave me a lump sum. I am flat busted broke living in Cusco, Peru, and every $2.50 glass of red wine is bringing me closer to the parasite my shaman described.

2 years after doing ayahuasca (the thousands-year old medicinal jungle brew of the Amazon), with my Peruvian shaman in Cusco, I met him for lunch at Jack’s Cafe near the Plaza de Armas to chat. It was just last week.

We exchanged handshakes, decided on a hug, and then we sat down inside the cozy expat cafe, espresso grinders competing with our conversation. He ordered coffee and nothing else. I followed suit even though I was slightly hungry. We spoke for five minutes before he said something with his eyes shining oddly, as if to underscore the point. He, Juanma, looked powerful and healthy. I had forgotten how fit he was. He was the spitting image of John Malkovich – Peruvian-style, of course. For someone who smiled so much, he was not a man to be trifled with.

He took a long sip of his coffee before he spoke.

“Your parasite is going to kill you,” he said smiling broadly.

(This was Part 1 of 2) - To be continued...